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COMMUNICATION SKILLS

 

Name

 

Date

 

 

Our personal and group effectiveness is greatly determined by our communication skills

We generally respond to other in one of three way:

 

-         Aggressively-directly but with disregard of others’ rights or feeling

0        Passively-indirectly, avoiding conflict

+    Assertively-directly, honestly with regard

 

In the following situations, in the second column identify with a +, -, or 0, the type of response listed. All 3 types are found in each situation.  Put an X in the first column for the response that you would most likely make yourself. 

 

SITUATION 1…

 

You have a lot of homework tonight, and your mother asks you to do the dishes.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

Why don’t you do the dishes?  Can’t you see I have tons of homework?

 

 

All right, mom.

 

 

I have a ton of homework tonight, and I’d rather not have to do the dishes so I get my work finished.

 

SITUATION 2…

 

Your teacher has made a mistake grading your exam.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

You cheated me out of ten points on this problem.

 

 

I’ve discovered an error in the way my test was corrected.

 

 

Do nothing.

 

SITUATION 3…

 

Several friends at a party ask you to try drugs, but you don’t want to do it.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

Well, just this once won’t hurt.

 

 

You’re all crazy! What do you want to do that for?

 

 

No thanks.  I really don’t want to try drugs.

SITUATION 4…

 

Your friend knows your parents will be out of town and wants to have a party at your house.  You do not want to break your promise to your parents not to have a bunch of people over, but you don’t want to make your friend angry at you.  You are not busy that night.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

My cousin’s coming from out of town, and I have to be with him.

 

 

How can you think of doing something like that?  What would happen if anyone found out?

 

 

I don’t feel right about doing that.  Let’s go to a movie instead.

 

SITUATION 5…

 

Your friend wants to copy your homework, and you believe that copying is wrong.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

I worked hard on this, and I want the full credit for the assignment.  I don’t want to take the chance of getting caught.

 

 

Well, OK.  Be sure to change the words some.

 

 

That’s cheating!

 

SITUATION 6…

 

You would like to be nominated for student council.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

I think I am qualified and would like to be nominated for student council.

 

 

Don’t nominate Mark; he’s a creep.

 

 

You think to yourself, I hope someone nominates me.

 

SITUATION 7…

 

Someone you do not want to go out with asks you to a dance.  It is your first invitation.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

I’m sorry, I already have a date.

 

 

What? Sorry, I’m busy.

 

 

Thanks for asking, but I’d rather not.

 

 

SITUATION 8…

 

Your parents want you to attend the college they went to, but you would rather go somewhere else.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

I’ll think about what you have said, but I need to make my own decision.

 

 

You always try to run my life!

 

 

If you’re sure that’s what is best.

 

SITUATION 9…

 

You are talking to your friend and suddenly realize that if you don’t leave immediately you will be late for work.  He/she wants to keep on talking.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

I really ought to be going.

 

 

Oh, no, your don’t! You’re making me late for work.

 

 

I know you want to talk more, and we’ll get together after I’m through working. See you.

 

SITUATION 10…

 

You want to enroll in home economics but people are trying to discourage you by calling you names and making fun of you.  They do no think being good at household tasks is very important.

Response:

My

response

+,-,or 0

 

 

 

Get lost.  I’ll do as I please.

 

 

I want to learn to be a chef.  You’ll probably be surprised at what I can do.

 

 

Not enroll in the class.

 

 

(Source for this exercise:  Bingham, Edmondson, Styker Advocacy Press:

“Challenges: A Young Man’s Journal for Self-awareness and Personal Planning”)